Two Headed Dog, ????

Seriously weird dream last night.  Obviously means something.  Maybe.

A two-headed dog was put in my care.


This creature had no hind end, and therefore no anus or anything.  One head on each end.  It was white, wiry, and looked small, kinda like a scottie dog.


This dog would bite people, but not hard.  It was the first thing it did to me, bite me...


I told myself I could train it to love people again.


I found out the dog had diabetes and would have special meal requirements.  It also occurred to me that anything with a head on each end would have to excrete out of one - a horrid thought.


I told myself, no one else will take care of this poor creature, just because it is different.


But I will.


I love animals, and all living things in general.  I feel like everything has a right to life, and to be respected.  I wanted so badly to help this dog, and care for it.

I feel like it must have meant something... it was too clear, too vivid...



Also, I found a text file on my desktop that was supposed to be a reminder to myself of dreams I had, but it has been so long, I do not remember a lot about these.  I'm posting my shorthand, because it's just funny how confusing it looks as shorthand, haha...

People building own computers in future 

(seems legit.)

random sexy guy chomping on neck while playing a game that decided the end of the world 

(uh.... huh...?)

Large apartment, didn't use half, something behind a door

Felt weak nearing it, almost swooning

Opened door, little black boy in a dusty cell cowering from something

Talk of radiation

A kitten escaped through the hole into our apartment

(I remember this one being like a nightmare, almost...)

Oven dog

(Literally, it was me who put an old dog into a cremation oven.  I think this was brought on by my discussions with volunteers at animal shelters.  Fucking terrible.  *shiver*)

lucid dream, fighting over clear files

ran out after fighting for them

could fly

flew over to an antique civil-war-ish house

Bailey on porch

looked and saw another Bailey

Realized was dreaming

walked with one Bailey through a street

Thought to self what a waste it was to be dreaming of this

(whut)

(Bailey is the neighborhood stray cat, btw)

late for work

but got into a weird fight with a blonde

arrested

excused from work absence

(wtf... what were we fighting over lolwut)

The Fan, Rob Swire, Heaven, Pugs!

Wow, okay, wow, it has been two months since I wrote down a dream in here!  Mostly because I am lame and procrastinatory, but I also went through a weird period in April where I did not dream nearly so much.

But, I return to you now with these 'gems', ffff.

Also, apparently I am the last to know that dreams do not occur just in REM sleep tra la laaaa.  If you did not know yet, either, then someone is just trying to make me feel dumb. Ff.

These three are from random points in the last couple of months that have stuck with me this whole time due to whatever reason.  Enjoy!

I was a published writer who sold his soul to the devil.  The deal was, I had to front a rock band in exchange for my book selling incredible amounts.  (And the soul, that too.)


But there were stipulations.  After every concert, I had to have sex with five people.  Five, oh my god.  If I didn't, there were terrible, unspoken consequences, that I really did not want to ask about.


Fast forward several months into this deal.  I am exhausted, totally tired of fulfilling my strange quota, and really starting to regret the deal I'd made just to get my book on every bestseller list in the world.


Back in the present, my bodyguards have invited the two people I'd selected.  When they asked about the other three, I told them I just could not.  Not tonight.


The girl and the boy I chose turn out to be brother and sister.  They invite me back to their home (their parents' home!).  And while we walked there, the boy confesses that he is really young (15-ish), but is my biggest fan.


We get to the house and go in.  The sister tells me to try out her brother first, retiring to her room to wait for me.


So, here I sit, a shy, trembling virgin in my lap, telling me how much he loves me.  But he's scared, I can feel it.  I tell him I can't.  Not here, not in this room.  This is wrong.


To hell with the consequences.  I could not have sex with a scared child.


Things to know about me:
I love virgins, in every shape, size, color, and gender.  Everything in between.  So the way this dream slanted just really hit me in the face: wasn't it what I wanted?  Why the sudden guilt?  Why was he so afraid...

I don't really know what it happened like that.  You would think that in a dream, I would get my way, haha :)

This next one involves Rob Swire.

source: tribalmixes.com

In a small room, I was invited, along with thirty or so other people, to a private CD sale with Rob.

The details are fuzzy, but I remember the prices being phenomenal - only about a dollar per disc.  Like he was trying to get rid of them.

But suddenly... he started crying midsentence.  Doubled-over, seriously sobbing.

I went over to him and held him.  I shushed him, let him cry.

I told him, that I loved him.  As a human being, I really loved him. He told me the same.

This love we were talking about was not love for each other.  It was like... the love of the bond we all share as human beings.  To love someone just because they are human, and we are all human, and they are hurt.

This dream culminated with all of us dancing Circle of Life style to upbeat music.  Really strange.

I do have recurring dreams about Rob a lot, but this one was the most pleasant I've ever had.  Seriously.  It's weird, but it made me feel emotionally complete.

Next one I had after drinking coffee and going to bed.  oAo

I knew I was dreaming, and just how to control it.  I wanted to see heaven, the ultimate safe space.

So, I went through a ghostly door leading to my 'heaven'.

It was a large pool, strangely shaped, like a strange circle drawn with large pixels.  White bricks composed it and the surrounding area, until they reached the border of dirt and bushes.

These bushes had wide leaves, the greenest I'd ever seen.  Trees with long, sweeping, willow-like branches swayed in the soft wind, rustling gently.

It was not hot or cold.  Almost as if it had no temperature.

I walked over to the edge of the water.  I tested the water with my foot to see if it were too cold or too warm, but it too had no temperature.

With the bright sky above, the lovely wind, and this gorgeous pool of water, I really was in heaven.

Later in the dream, I woke up within the dream, and was talking to another person about what I'd seen.  He told me dreams were meant to be kept to oneself.  I told him they were visions meant to be shared.

So lovely.  I can't believe how beautiful this dream was.  So.... so beautiful...

Last one for now, guys.  Just woke up from a nap and had this dream.  C:

I had a random tattoo of a pug on my ankle that I could not remember getting!  On my freaking ankle!

Just a wide-eyed little cutie looking up with its little bug-eyes.

Later, I looked back down, and it had changed.  It was now upside-down, looking up at me, with tail-wagging motion lines.

I do love pugs, I do want a tattoo, but a pug tattoo?  Oh hell.  Now I sort of want one, but that is ridiculous.  Pugs are rediculous.

source: pugsplace.com

So, yeah, that's all for me.  Yaaaay!

Also, I have decided that based on my crazy dreams and what I ate before dreaming, there is no correlation to food eaten vs. dreams.  Caffeine in the system while sleeping, however, I honestly believe does make the dream more vivid.

Good night, sleep well!  Sweet dreams, everyone.

Potentially tripping balls, please stand by

Oh man, I have just had the craziest, most psychedelic, sexual dream ever.  Oh my god.  Okay.  Here we go.

A boy washed up on shore one morning.  I somehow knew he had been raped and thrown to sea.


I held him against me all morning, waiting for him to awaken.


One of my irl coworkers (yesss this again), Piper, joined me in waiting for him to wake up.  Apparently, he was at least partially robotic, and the water had not done good things to him, so she had me open the panel on the back of his neck and press some buttons.


He awoke with the most furious thrashing ever.  We both had to hold him down with he got over the panic attack.


Then, I realized someone had written PIPER down all over the back of his neck.  I looked at her.


He calmed down, then looked at her angrily.  "You're that bitch from McDonalds who wouldn't give me the special because I left my coupon at home."


"That's her job," I interjected, then let him go on his merry way.


Later (I can only assume it was the same crazed androidbot), girls began to go missing.  Four, in fact.


I traced them back to this house with a long flight of stairs leading into a creepy-ass basement.  I stood at the top of the stairs with another boy, one who lived in this house.


Through the darkness, a light show began to play.


First, a song came on.  A dark, gritty, slow rock song, with a male singer telling me in a voice full of sex that he would get me 'as hypnotized as lightning'.


Then, in neon colors like a Lite Brite, shapes began to form on the ceiling of the stairwell.  It turned into a space scene, with rockets and stars.


Slowly, a light came on at the bottom of the stairs.  The missing girls were there, naked, masturbating with each other.  The music got louder, the lights went out.


When they came back on, it was a single naked bulb above a table, set up just past the first step.  On it where three large candles, with two wicks apiece.  The wicks were bending over and standing up in time to the beat.


I can only assume that if this person was trying to get me to come down the stairs, it definitely worked.

Yes, sir, I'd love to be one of your trippy masturbating girls locked in an eternal light show.  Ooookay then.

The Maid / Hamlet, Celty

People mentioned: Jerry

A very sexually charged evening, I've had.

In one, I was in a very fancy, skimpy maid's outfit.  Jerry and I were getting into some kinky cowgirl-position bondage.


Our real sex life is no where near as exciting.

In the other, I got to meet Hamlet Machine, author of the comic sensation Starfighter.  In my dream, she looked like this one actress from the independent movie 'Ink'.

source: http://www.knowthemovies.com/

This is what she actually looks like: (she's in the middle, and I'm just seeing this for the first time today C:)

source: http://www.starfightercomic.com/

She was super cool.  But I had to take a rickety elevator in a pretty decrepit building to the top floor to get to her.

When I bade her farewell (after talking about what, I can only speculate at this point) I tried to take the elevator down.  But it jammed.  Alarm bells went off as it spiraled between floors like it was on rubber bands.

When the doors finally opened and the lift came to a halt, it was... Shinra from Durarara opening the doors for me.  And I was looking into the building's secret basement.

I was both delighted and confused, so I followed him out of the elevator.  So, apparently, in my dreams, he's a mad scientist, rather than a rouge doctor.  So, guess what was sitting on a leather couch just randomly in the middle of the concrete floor?

Celty.  And not just any Celty.  Robot Celty.

With no ado whatsoever, I plopped myself into her lap and made out with her.  Well, as close to making out as you can when one party has no head  But I sure as hell felt up that lovely pile of circuits ♥  Yes yes.  ♥♥

RoboCelty?  Why didn't my waking mind ever think of that??!  That is just, aah, too much.  No wonder I dropped everything I was doing like "I'mma hit that asap bro thanks."

I'm probably so hypersexual because I've received literally the BEST piece of gift art that I ever have in my entire life.  It's hot as hell.  I feel asleep restless and fitful, and apparently it translated well into dreams 8D;;;

The Concert

People mentioned: Jerry

So, I've been neglecting this page, D:  Mostly because I'm so procrastinatory, and partially because of my book getting released.  Soooo.

Last night, I dreamt of Rob.  (That's Rob Swire, for those not in the kno~ow.)

My dreams of him range from ecstasy to hell, and this one was like a somewhat psychedelic version of hell.

It was late at night.  Eleven, to be exact.


Jerry and I were getting ready to go to the Knife Party concert (irl, this will be happening in March.)  But time was moving in slow motion...


The concert was to start at nine, but every movement I made was taking hours.


I began to draw, with a thick black paint-dipped brush.  I traced lovingly every contour of his face, the deep shadows beneath his eyes, and around his head, I drug a slow halo.  


As trite as it was, I told him in my heart, "You are my angel."


I had never thought of it this way.  I felt moved, deep in my heart.


It was then three am before I knew it, as I was stroking the final golds and blacks onto the huge piece.  We were in the car, moving both fast and in slow motion at the same time.  My heart was sinking, and the panic kicked in - was I too late?


I felt really helpless to get this piece of my work to him.  I think the picture I drew represented every internal feeling I have for this man, and running so far behind represents every missed opportunity I've had to give him art or catch his eye.

It was really distressing.

I woke up in a strange, quiet mood.  Not quite ready to take on the day.

Love Babies, With Love From LMFAO

People mentioned:  Jerry!

Dude, freaky dream, gotta run it by you guys.  o___O

I was gaining weight inexplicably.  I asked a friend and they told me I was pregnant!  Gasp!


Oh god, Jerry!  I'm pregnant!


But, it's not yours!


It must be.... REDFOO'S BABY.

image from http://mixredding.com/

But you've got to be fucking kidding me.

But yes, alas!  I must be pregnant, for I must pee every ten minutes!

Oh, Jerry, I am so scared, but oddly accepting of the fact that I am bulbous with baby!  O god, I have betrayed your love!

By the end of the dream, it turned out I was just a little overweight, not pregnant, but had still screwed a crazy ass not-quite-rapper that I have no sexual desire for in real life, thus cheating on my manfriend.  D:

I'll create a new tag for WTF, but I don't know if I'll ever use it again after this O____O

A Long Night

For mentioned names, please see Quick Ref tab above.
People mentioned here: Jerry, Brianna

I slept way too long last night, so I had a multitude of craziness.

To preface, I'm not particularly under a lot of stress, it feels like.  I'm in a better state of mind than I've been in possibly a year.  I'm making (slightly) more money and between Jerry and myself we're doing alright.  My favorite famous person in the world is coming to Tennessee for the first time ever to blast us all away, my apartment is somewhat clean and starting to get furniture.

In short/tl;dr - I feel much happier than normal.

So, I get weird dreams!  Enjoy.  XD

I was driving late at night in a strange place.  When late night turned to early morning, I decided I wanted some Burger King breakfast croissants.


Somehow, instead of ending up at Burger King, I was suddenly in Las Vegas, early morning.  I was wearing tight, shiny, purple, leopard prints pants and a purple tank top like something straight out of an LMFAO music video.


I went into a casino that happened to be having a random drawing for thousands of dollars towards dream weddings.  I leapt at the chance - there were going to be three drawings, and even third place got $1,000 dollars.


Turns out I knew the other two in the contest - Meagan, one of my coworkers, and the third one, I don't remember anymore.  Oops.

This is Meagan, although I have no idea what's going on in this pic :o)

When the draw happened, the three of us were the three winners.  Imagine that!  So in order to claim my $1k, I had to go through processing.


Now, processing in this dream meant getting put in a little booth that traveled through underground tunnels, like a cross between what happened in Caspar and a carnival ride.  All the while, a narrator was telling me how the guy who was going to 'process' me hoped I was hot so he could probably molest me, but since I wasn't, it was disappointing.


Wtf?  Self esteem issues much?
Dude, I just the other day had a drunk discussion with someone about how beautiful I thought she was and vice-versa XDDD  My self esteem issues should be fixed by now.

Other than that, wow, okay, random Caspar sequence from my far off childhood and Vegas?  I mean, I love Vegas, so why not dream about it?

I was sitting on the top of some bleachers that were folded in, i.e., in compact mode.  I could not jump to get down and was sort of stuck.


Then, magically and randomly, Brianna appeared out of nowhere and started sliding the bleachers out by hand to help me down.


When I got down, she took me by the hand and we walked off.  I felt intensely giddy and girly.


Like Inception said, the desire for catharsis is greater than the desire for revenge.

This next one is a little more difficult to remember, as I waited a few days to post it.  Here it goes, to the best of my memory...

It was night, in a mutated fun house straight out of nightmares.  Broken lightbulbs on the exterior, clowns with chipping paint faces, and a creaking sound to every metal bone in its body.


Within, I was all but trapped, but this was no nightmare.  I remember riding a shaking elevator barely big enough for one up and down the levels.  Inside was a little robotic clown girl who said nothing, but listened to my problems every time I rode.


I later found out she was sentient.  The next time I rode the elevator, I tried to talk to her, but she still would not respond.


Beside the funhouse was a set of rusted, overgrown train tracks.  I could hear whistling in the distance, but there was no train.


What's frustrating is that I know there was a lot more cool things to this but since I'm a procrastinator I have totally forgotten it all.  Oh well.